13 December 2011

Working out with 3

Nitty gritty:

Ryan - worked out ~6 days/week while pregnant until the week before delivery; good eats; gained 40 lbs. Started working out after 6 weeks postpartum. Took 9 months to get pre-baby body back. Just couldn't lose the weight/inches.

Brayden - worked out 4-5 days/week while pregnant until about 1-2 weeks before delivery; good eats; gained 40 lbs. Started working out 2 weeks postpartum. Took 2.5/3 months to get pre-baby body back. I "probably" over did it trying to get back into shape with this one.

Gabby - worked out 3 days/week while pregnant until the day before delivery; good eats; gained 30 lbs. Started working out ~3 weeks postpartum. Weight is down to pre-pregnancy weight, but I'm not as firm as I was before. Hard to know since I was coming off of IM when I got pregnant (being in that shape then getting pregnant sucked).

I'm managing to workout about 4 days/week right now, but it's just "recreational". A spin class here, a short run there with a body pump class sandwiched in there to aid with getting things toned up. I feel pretty good with my average fitness level right now, I just want everything to tighten up. Realistically though, just getting a workout in is a win given schedules around here.

I asked my OB at the last appointment how long it might take for the stomach skin to tighten up and she sort of laughed at me and said "it depends on your genetics, but realistically it won't. You're fighting age now too." WHAT, I'm not old...okay, I'm older (than I was), but I'm not OLD. "You can use the creams on the market but they are just a money making scheme and don't do anything, and a plastic surgeon is probably going to tell you that the risks outweigh the benefits in your case...you've got a flatter tummy than 97% of women out there post baby...you should be happy." Umm, yeah ok.

I figure my athletic goals are basically on "hold" for about 3-4 years right now, things are just too hectic to be aiming for anything other than good aerobic fitness. Now seeing the stages of life from 0-5 years, when Gabby is 3-4 that should be a decent time with the boys being 8 and 6 and more independent. So I'm just settling into this new stage of life...and really it's not so bad, until you talked to my 16 year old competitive self. I wish she would get herself under control.

07 December 2011

How's it been going

It's been a wild ride the last 5 months! Yep, Gabby is 5 months old; hard to believe. I don't know what I would have done had she been a more difficult baby, it's really the only thing that kept the little bit of sanity remaining in me. But one thing is for sure...3 is not the same as 2. I don't know how many people I had asked before we got pregnant with #3 about how difficult it really was, and the consensus was "oh, adding one more isn't really anything" "not bad at all"...uh wrong answer.

Don't get me wrong, I think by the time you get to the third one, you've pretty much gotten over all of your OCDish, crazy first time parent tendencies and you've relaxed a lot more. So in that regard, maybe you don't feel as overwhelmed about a baby being in the house. One thing I've come to realize is that one child makes you a parent, two gives you perspective and three makes you completely change your strategy. We are out numbered, and whereas having a 5 and 3 year old that are for the most part pretty independent at this point, there is still constant supervision needing to be had around here. The boys are wide open.

When you try to juggle a 5 year old newly in kindergarten, a 3 year old suffering from no longer being THE baby, and a newborn with all that comes with it...well it's just crazy at times. My idea of cleanliness has become way more relaxed than I ever thought it would, and the main goals to accomplish by the end of the day are: full bellies, no broken bones, as few meltdowns as possible and quality time.

A few years ago I posted about difficulties I had with postpartum depression with both the boys. So this was actually a real concern after this pregnancy. "They" say that you are more prone to develop ppd if you have previously experienced it and that it gets more severe each time. Given how bad it was after Brayden, we were prepared this time and more aware than ever of what sets it off and precautions to take to avoid it. It was a huge relief at my 6 week check up when they gave me the survey that I only scored a 2 or 3 out of 10...10 being ppd.

I started back to work after 6 weeks at 30 hrs/week, which is the schedule I had from about 6 months into the pregnancy until I left to deliver. It was hard. It was the first time I had to put one of the kids in daycare before their 1st birthday and seeing her there with kids that were all 3 months older than her broke my heart. Dealing with that on top of the stress from work was starting to add up. I was a team lead over 8 people for a drug safety team and it was just a lot to deal with.

So about a month ago, I went to the doctor when I started feeling the change come over me. I retook the ppd survey and scored a 7 out of 10. They told me I had triggered on the anxiety/stress questions and that they didn't think it was really depression at that point, but I got a good talking to about things I needed to try to do to keep it from getting worse. I walked out with a prescription for medication and found myself crying in the car on the way home. We had been so careful to keep this from happening and here it was smacking me in the face again. Why on earth?

So in the end, the solution ended up being me quitting my job. Now, there were other reasons that made this the right move, but this was certainly a contributing factor. This time, there is no "part-time" or "from-home"...it's just me at home with Brayden and Gabby. I'm admittedly a little scared, but very excited. In my head I think, "what do I do all day with them". But I've already started to make a schedule. Unfortunately, not much can be done right now because of the holidays, but by January we'll be set. Swim classes, story times, parks, maybe find a play group. The best thing, I get to volunteer one day a week in Ryan's room at school. I went this week and had a blast. The look on his face when I got there was priceless and hearing him whisper to his friends "that's my mommy, see I told you my mommy was coming...she's my mommy". It just made me know that this was the right move for us.

I take nothing away from a woman that can juggle being a wife, mother and a full time employee...in fact being a wife/mother are a full time job within itself. But indeed, adding a third child proved to be the straw that broke this camel's back. When I was at work, I was preoccupied with thoughts of the kids, Tim and the house...and when I was at home, I was preoccupied with what needed to be done at work. I just didn't feel like I was doing anything to the best that I could. I'm very lucky that I have an understanding and supportive husband and that we are financially in a place that we can afford it.

So I've been at home now since Thanksgiving and my stress level has dropped tremendously. The house is taking a while to get organized since it was just a mess from 5 months of neglect, Gabby is still a gem and just getting so big and nearly mobile (yikes), Brayden is loving the 1 on 1 time he's getting now (which is helping his middle child syndrome to chill) and Ryan seems happy.

Life is good in my house, or at least getting better and back on track.

22 November 2011

Just a Quickie

So this is what's keeping me busy these days. Hard to get out of bed when you're snuggled up next to this in the mornings. And just a few more pics of Gabby. She's such a great baby. Following both brothers, sleeping very well and always a smile on her face! Makes it a little easier with 3.The boys are loving life and enjoying their little sister. Ryan started kindergarten in August and is adjusting well. Brayden is just a crazy kid.

02 August 2011

Slacker 101

This is just a quick post to say that Gabrielle Mackenzie Gautreau was born on 03 July at 12:24 pm. She was 8lbs and 19 inches long with a head full of black hair and dark blue eyes. So far she is a wonderful baby, very laid back and easy. The boys have taken to her very well.

It's been surprisingly easy adding her to the family but our days are pretty tight, so I'm really strapped for free time currently. I'll give a better post with pictures soon!

23 June 2011

39 Weeks - Restless

I really have no words. Im sure that most women understand being this far along in a pregnancy, this late in the summer is not comfortable physically, much less when emotionally and mentally you are just toast. Needless to say I had convinced myself that this pregnancy would end early as the other two did, but no such luck.

If I have to answer somebody looking at me and asking "You haven't had that baby yet?" one more time "Nope, sure haven't". I'm going to scream. I have nothing else to say. I'm just tired. There has been no progress physically in the last 3 visits. I'm at a loss. I thought that your body progresses more quickly with subsequent pregnancies, so it blows my mind that I'm 39 weeks I'm not even as far along as I was with pregnancy No. 1 at 37 weeks.

Who knows. I have actually run 3 times in the last 10 days, in addition to numerous times on the elliptical. The running actually felt good during and there was only minor stiffness in the pelvic floor afterward. It's extremely slow, and I'm sure some Olympic speed walkers could pass me, but I'm calling it running anyway. But apparently it didn't really help anything along so who knows if I'll do it again.

My next appointment is next Tuesday and my due date is next Thursday. I'm beyond ready for this baby to make it's way into our world, as are the boys. Ryan told me today he was excited for the baby to come out now. Please baby, listen to your older brother; I don't think he will be excited too long so we need to take advantage of this opportunity!

10 June 2011

Eagleman is here- 37 weeks

I remember when I posted in Nov/Dec 2010 that I was pregnant again that we were worried I would go into labor while at Eagleman for Tim...well Eagleman is here. And where am I? Literally? Right now I'm driving in the car on the way to Cambridge, still pregnant.

I'm very excited about this race for Tim, although my o.b. office is less than happy with my decision to travel "more than 1 hour away". Oh well. My response is this: hospitals in Maryland are just as capable in delivering babies as my hospital in Cary. Shoot, there are still women in Africa that go into the woods, squat, push and go back to picking berries..or something like that. I think we'll be ok. The only thing that sucks is having to stop every 1.5 hours...errr, turns a long trip into a LONG trip.

Last week at my 36 week visit, the midwife I saw absolutely scared the crap out of me. She told me I was measuring small and had been measuring small for the last 3 visits. "Didn't they tell you?" Uh, no they didn't. So what are you thinking? What is the issue? "Well, could just be a small baby, oh never mind...you have big babies." "Could just be that you are hiding the pregnancy well or could be not enough fluid in the uterus or could be the baby isn't growing well. Monitor your movements and if it decreases, we may need to do an ultrasound."

I freaked out. I'm a worrier, I'm an anxious person. Tim often says that he leaves the worrying to me because I do enough for everyone in the family. So I didn't sleep all last weekend. Up all night, poking the belly "move baby, move for mommy." Nothing. I was a wreck. So I called Monday morning and they brought me in for monitoring. I was hooked up for over 1.5 hours before the main dr. (Dr. V) said, "not the most active baby, but I've seen enough to let you go for now. Make sure to schedule the ultrasound for tomorrow." Will do.

Tuesday, US showed normal growth range, normal fluid, normal everything except for a slightly small head size (and ladies you know we don't mind that at all, right!). So Dr. confirmed what us technician saw and said we just have a smaller baby this time. Although I laugh to think this baby will be small... experience tells me we probably just have a long, lanky baby, but I'm no dr. or us tech.

So at nearly 37 weeks, I have not progressed anywhere close to where I was with either Ryan or Brayden and this one dropped about 3 weeks ago. The only difference I can see is that my exercise has been extremely less this time than before. So perhaps it is true, that the exercise really does help your body prepare. Dang fatigue, two kids, full time job, house and other crap that has kept me from working out as much. I better not go to term with this one, I won't know what to do with myself.

04 June 2011

Desperate Mommy to Mission control

I've been wondering if the potty gods had been listening to me for the past 4-5 months or not. I honestly believed that potty training Brayden would be so much easier since he had both Ryan and Tim to model himself after. Peer pressure of sorts. Well, he has proven to be just as difficult as Ryan was.

We started potty training Ryan at 3, a bit late now that I look back at it, but he had a lot of emotional adjustment after Brayden was born so it didn't seem like the right time to force the issue at 2 years old. By the time Ryan was 3.5 we were potty trained and only wearing a pull up at night for the occasional accident that would occur. I'd say that 8 months after starting we were out of pull ups at night all together. He's only had a few accidents since then.

So with Brayden, I wanted to start him at 2.5 years. We waited a little longer than that, he was about 2 years 9 months. The peeing part was relatively easy to get him used to. A lot of reminding him to go but getting him to stand up was a breeze because he likes going with Ryan. They have their "boy time" around the potty. Except for Ryan trying to tell Brayden he has to "point it up" the first time, we're doing well.

Pooping, a completely different story. Oh my dear. It was also Ryan's downfall, but he would at least sit on the potty and try. Brayden just screams. Regardless of song singing, bribes, whether he has to go or not. My goal was to have him potty trained before no. 3 got here. In conjunction with his strong will not to cooperate, is my very high hormone level with this pregnancy as compared to the others. I'm just not so patient at all this time around. It's killing me.

After numerous conversations with Brayden that he doesn't need to go in his pants or he needs to tell us when he's had an accident, I was beginning to wonder if he just didn't understand the "pooping feeling" so to speak. I'll share a quick story that some of you that follow on face book may have read about. I was getting things out of our car and Brayden had walked to the door in the garage. He had let the dog in the garage and was sitting by the steps leading to the house talking to the dog. All of a sudden I hear the house door shut and Bowden (the dog) comes around the back of the car. I start walking to the door and Bowden stops dead in his tracks, lifting up his front leg and turning around to look at me as if to say "ewww yuk, not me". I looked down and there were two piles of poop sitting at the bottom of the steps. When I asked Brayden if he pooped on the garage floor his reply "Well yeah, but it wasn't in my pants."

So now, I know he realizes the feeling, he's just playing games. So that day I stopped talking about it. At day care, his teacher told me to start sending him in underwear; so I did. And I found that he will take himself at daycare without a reminder and no accidents. Still no pooping but peeing we're there. Are you hearing me potty gods, please help. I need this child to be mostly potty trained by the time this new addition gets here, for my own sanity, please.

Then it happened. Last night. Tim said "Brayden, did you just poopy in your pants?" "No, I just passed gas". Check of underwear showed no poop. Me: "Brayden let's go sit on the potty please so we don't have an accident". The screaming and crying and stomping commenced. I sat him down, was going to try singing songs but that got him more upset. "Brayden, just try to push some poopy out, we're going to sit on the potty for a while, you can't get up until you try." More crying, more "No poopy, there is no poopy."

Tim came in there, and bribed with food/drink, toys whatever. And then the heavens opened up. In the middle of Tim saying "buddy we'll give you whatever you want if you just...." Tim shut up, he's pushing. And viola, poopy in the potty! There was a massive celebration. Bigger than Garner when what's his name just won American Idol. We went to the store and he got to pick out a "poopy present" which ended up being a green sword. And the rest of the night brought "I'm so proud of you" and "You're such a big boy" and "That makes me so happy".

Now here's to hoping this wasn't just a one time deal and he'll actually try to do it again. Work with me potty gods, work with me, pretty please with sugar on top?!!! We've got somewhere between 1 and 4 weeks left to get this mostly done.

27 May 2011

Check list

35 week check list:

Crib/bassinet put back together- check
Baby's room clean - mostly check
Baby toys/equipment washed - check
Baby bottles washed - check
Food cooked and frozen - check
House clean - check
Baby supplies - mostly check
Fork lift needed to turn over in bed - check
New car with 3rd row seat - check
Work issues wrapped up and passed along - check
Sudden busts of energy - check
Physical signs of advancing - definitely check
Braxton Hicks - definitely for a while now
Ryan and Bradyen ready - check
Mommy ready - check

Tim ready - not yet
Early registration for hospital - Not yet
Waddle - not yet, but slow starts and a definite sway
Internal progression: To be checked next week

Will it really take 5 more weeks to get the last 4 checked? Hmmmm....

21 May 2011

The Countdown Begins

Or continues, I'm not sure which. I think I started counting down around 10 weeks out. This pregnancy, I consistently gained weight from the time I found out I was pregnant at 4 weeks until week 30. Even having been through it twice before and understanding it all, I was getting a little worried that I would tip the scales this go around...or break them I should say.

But miraculously from 30 to 32 weeks, no weight gain. From 32 to 34 weeks, no weight gain. Now let's just play a game for a minute. Hmmm, pregnancy number 1 (Ryan). I gained 40 lbs with ~ 6-7 hours of aerobic activity/week and healthy eating. Other than Tim always taking me to Coldstones and the Frosty craving...I was a good girl. He was head down since 32 weeks and dropped around 33 weeks. I went for my 37 week visit, I had lost 2 lbs from the previous visit and went into labor that night at midnight.

Pregnancy #2 (Brayden). I gained 35 lbs with ~4-5 hours of aerobic activity a week and was really a good eater. I didn't really splurge often with him, just a bunch of spicy food. I was 3cm and 80% effaced since week 32 and was certain I would go as early as I did with Ryan because of these facts. Until they informed me that "no your body just prepares a lot more quickly with subsequent pregnancies". And how true that really is now that I've had a chance to experience a third pregnancy is all I will say on that front. I went for my 38 week visit with no weight gain, and at the 39 week visit had lost 1 lb and went into labor the next morning. Brayden never dropped before or after labor started.

Pregnancy #3 (Gavin or Gabrielle not sure yet): I have currently gained 30 lbs with ~ 3 hours of aerobic activity/week. I have been a superior eater this time, until recently and now just can't kick the sweet craving. Keeping a full time job, a house, two kids and a husband with being pregnant just doesn't allow for such foolish things like working out every day. I have just under 6 weeks to go till the due date and for a month now have not gained weight.

Now when you do research, they say that weight gain stopping or a weight loss can often indicate impending labor. I am not so foolish as to think that I may go into labor 6 weeks earlier, only that maybe I gained all my weight early with this one and now that little person is just surviving on the fat stores I created early on.

I'm tired. The weight and size of the baby has definitely hit me and my movements have slowed down. I'm nesting some sort of awful right now. Cleaning, sorting, pacing, cooking/freezing, and even freaking out a little over the change that is about to be ours. But for the first time too, I'm getting excited over this pregnancy. We've had too much going on this year for me to really even notice that I'm pregnant and actually enjoy it like I could the other two. But I think we are all ready to meet this new person. Brayden especially..."mommy, is the baby gonna climb out yet?"

Come on baby, time to climb out.

15 May 2011


In our family, April-July is birthday extravaganza. It is kicked off on 25th April with my sister, then May is the highlight...09th if my mom, 10th is Brayden, 14th is Tim's dad and the 26th is Tim. June will soon be baby #3 and then July is met with 03rd for Tim's mom, 26th for my dad and the 27th for Ryan. It's wild and crazy...especially when you throw in mother's day and father's day. I can't keep up with it all.

Growing up, birthdays were a family thing. Not that I didn't have birthday parties that involved friends, because I did have plenty that way. But the focus was family time. Perhaps it's because we didn't live near any family but whatever the reason that's the way it was. Low key and nice. We were never really a family of over exaggerating things or bringing attention to ourselves; I guess my lesson in humility was learned at an early age.

So for the first few years for both Ryan and Brayden, their birthday parties were simply a gathering of the grandparents and a few other family members. Nothing elaborate, just a homemade cake and ice cream and presents at the house. When Tim and I moved into the house where we are now, 2 years ago, that changed. I don't know if it was the "peer pressure" of our neighborhood or what.

Last year, for Ryan's 4th birthday, we went a little crazy. All he wanted was Muddy the Mudcat (local AAA baseball mascot) and the "Dancing Man" from our races. We produced both, had every kid from the neighborhood (about 15) plus a few school friends and some work friends. We ordered pizza, sprinklers and mad craziness outside. Of course we did this at the house and I was high strung and crazy about the mess and people in the house. Ridiculous.

For Brayden this year, his 3rd birthday; we rented a little indoor play place and did pizza and cupcakes but only invited kids from school. Fewer people and not at my house so less stress but higher cost. Again, just ridiculous.

When you take into account their age, let's think about how truly insane this is. They will never remember these birthdays in the long run and would probably be just as happy at a playground or at home with a few friends. Why don't we save the big bashes for the older years when they have something they are really interested in? Because we feel the pressure of giving our children more than we had, the "go big or go home" theory I suppose.

'Keeping up with the Jones'" Well, dang the Jones'. Because not only am I succumbing to the pressure of where we go and what we do for a birthday, as if it somehow validates how good a parent we are, but we are now charged with the policy of supplying other children with presents at these parties so that they don't feel "left out". What is that about? I don't remember people giving me presents when I showed up for their birthday party when I was young. It was "tough crap" it's not your birthday, get over it if your feelings are hurt, it's not about you, it's about them. But again, that's the standard now.

The standard: over spend on some crazy "venue", presents, food, number of people and then buy those ~20 other kids a present. Correct me if I'm wrong, but it's cheaper and more beneficial to go to somebody else's party. You only spend 20 bucks on a present, get free food, a tired child and a present for your kid. Now that's what I'm talking about. Okay, I think we've paid our dues for "dumbness" for trying to be like the people next door, next year, we're back to simple.

05 May 2011

Nights Out

When you go from single/dating to being married and then married with children, something happens. Or it least it did for Tim and I. Like a slow change from every night being "our night" to struggling to find a night that belongs only to us.

Even before the boys came along, a small transformation started; we stopped going out on dates as often because we were always around each other. We got comfortable. Then Ryan was born, and as a new mom, I found it hard to leave him. Even going to the grocery store without him was hard at first. So dates became even more rare. Nights were spent either resting or doing something with Ryan.

And then Brayden joined the family. This definitely changed the family dynamic. We saw the need Ryan had to still have his one-on-one time, so we made a change. With the help of my parents, who agreed to watch each boy for 1 night each week, we were able (and still maintain) to implement special nights every week for each boy to have one-on-one time with Tim and I. Great for them, but still leaving little time for us to do stuff alone. It wasn't for a lack of offers for people to watch the boys, but again me feeling guilty about already having taken time away from them and not wanting to take more time on the weekends. But I see the difference this makes with Ryan. He really enjoys getting us all to himself, understandably so. He was first, he was used to nobody else but him. Brayden enjoys the time too, but he will often ask for Ryan before the night is over.

So now that baby no. 3 is actually becoming a reality and not just a thought in the back of our mind, again we find ourselves in a position of trying to figure out how we will get our night out.

I'm wondering if it will be impossible once the baby is born for us to continue one night each week for each boy. I guess we could do a weekly rotation. Ryan gets a night week 1, Brayden week 2, baby #3 week 3 and then Tim and I week 4. I'm a little worried about how it will all pan out, if not how it will pan out, just how long it will take to actually get into that new routine that satisfies everyone's need for a night out and time alone...you know the time and attention you need to fill your tank.

To be honest, I don't think my tank would be half as full as it is if it weren't for Tim's persistence in us getting our time. He's pretty good about noticing when it's been too long and actually planning something for us to do, if only for a night. I think I need my night.

29 April 2011

Over 31 weeks down

So I had to stop running at 25 weeks with this pregnancy. I had my last run in the mountains of West Virginia while Tim and I were at Greenbrier. Tim took the "up the mountain" trail and I stuck to the golf course run course. It was a nice winding 4 mile run, but I knew when it was over that I was done for the remainder of the pregnancy.

I was just altering my run form too much to compensate for the weight gain/distribution. My calves and achilles were killing me during and after the run for the next day. I'm certainly about trying to stay fit while I'm pregnant, but injuring myself long-term in order to stay fit is just stupid. So after talking with Tim about it, we decided it best that I stop running.

So that was a little more than 6 weeks ago and it didn't bother me much because I could still spin, swim and do the elliptical. Well, swimming although it feels good on the body/joints, makes me feel like a whale when I put my swim suit on, and the elliptical is sort of boring, but I manage both infrequently. But the spinning, that I can do like 4 days a week.

Until this past week, I was still spinning comfortably on the spinners at the gym with no real aerobic difference or issues with the fit on the bikes. Almost over night, that changed. This past week, my pelvis seems to have moved in such a way that sitting on the seat for more than 3-4 minutes causes major discomfort and lower back pain. On top of that I've got the handle bars as high as they can go and it's getting hard to use them due to some huge growing mass around my mid section. I have to say though that I still managed a 75 minute and 1hr.45 min spin class this week.

Overall, I'm finding that I much less focused on exercise this pregnancy. I don't know if it's the reality of time, family, energy...or if I'm just at that point of "it is what it is" and no matter what I do it won't change the fact that I will gain weight, I will not be as fit as I was and it will get back to normal afterward. And that is OK. Or at least I keep telling myself that. Truth is, I'm still bothered by it somewhat, but heck, I'm not super woman and I don't want to try to be anymore.

16 March 2011

What's that you said?

Holy crap, it's been 2 months since my last blog post...I guess things got busy around here. In fact, my Internet time, when not at work, is limited to maybe 30 minutes a week these days. Too much to do. I'm 2 months out from the due date, but Tim and I are still plotting every ER/hospital from here to Cambridge for Eagleman...

So here's some funny and surprising things I've heard since the last post:

Ryan: Mommy, how are you going to get that baby out of your tummy?
Me: Well?, a doctor is going to help mommy push it out.
Ryan: Um, since you don't have a penis, how are you going to push it out?
Me: Uh? Well? Hmmmm...
Ryan: I guess you got some pipes in there to help, huh?
Me: Exactly.

Ryan:Where is daddy tonight?
Me: He's out playing poker with his friends.
Ryan: Is he at is boyfriends house?
Me (laughing hysterically)...yes, yes he is.

Brayden:When can I play with the baby?
Me: A few more weeks buddy.
Brayden: well let's dance now (as he tries to shake my belly vigorously)

Not so funny
Co-worker: You sure are looking pretty hippy Angela.
Me: ??? (blank stare)
Co-worker: Girl, your hips are spreading

Side not to above- Tim laughed at this thinking they were calling me a hippie and not that my hips were getting wide. Still not funny. I don't care if you are a woman and have kids or if you are a friend, you don't call attention to the changing body parts of a pregnant woman...your line should always be "You look great"

Co-worker:Wow, that got big over the weekend.
Me: thanks.

Dr.: you shouldn't be concerned about your weight gain, it's normal and we're not concerned.
Me: but I'm eating healthy, not a lot and exercising...I don't understand (yes even after 3 I don't get it)
Dr: well you are a big girl to begin with
Me:???? with a "oh no you didn't just say that" stare
Dr.:a taller girl is what I meant, and you have big babies, so don't worry about it

Nurse: It's nice to see a woman with a nice butt to grab onto
Me: What?!
Nurse: well normally the pregnant women I get in here for this shot are like little toothpicks...you got some good meat on you girl, your husband must like that.
Me: well I guess so since this is the third (said a little uncomfortably)
Nurse: (still grabbing my @$$ and shaking it) Yeah, that's nice, real nice.
Me: Can I pull my pants up now.
Nurse: I just need to work this medicine in a little more
Me: I think I can take care of that, thanks.

Note: the above was during an office visit to get my rhogam shot. The other two pregnancies they let me get this shot in my arm, but for some reason she insisted on putting this one in my buttocks. Not a fan, not a fan at all.

26 February 2011

Flu infected house and running

So Ryan was the first to catch it, about 3 weeks ago. We thought it was a common cold and by the time we took him to the doctor, it was too late to give him tamiflu...poor guy had to suffer through it some kind of awful for about a week.

Next was Tim, it knocked him down for about 4 days or so that same week that Ryan was sick. From Tim it moved to Brayden. We saw it day 1 and were at the dr. office and managed a prescription for Tamiflu. It was amazing the difference it made. He was still sick, but it wasn't the bed ridden horrible mess that Ryan and Tim had. All the while, I was pounding my prenatals, B complex and Emergen-C. On top of that I was trying to stay "away" from them all, but it's hard when all they want is mommy when they are sick...and how do you say "no".

So we were two weeks into the infected house and I was still "healthy"...that was Saturday night. Sunday morning, I woke up not feeling completely normal but still ok by my standards. Then Monday morning rolled around and I knew it had gotten to me. I tried to go to work and I managed all of 2.5 hours of work before I just looked at my manager and said "I have the flu, I need to go home". Yes, please leave...and I was walking away from my desk (no more than 5 steps mind you) I heard the Lysol can being sprayed.

When I got home, Tim was there with Brayden. I just went upstairs and zonked out; dr. wouldn't let me take anything but extra strength tylenol to control fever. I was a zombie for two days straight, well really for 5 days straight but at least I got out of bed after two days. So it moved into the chest and sinuses and I've been battling that for a week now. I actually disinfected the house so hopefully this crap is gone from us.

I've tried working out sporadically and it does seem to help to move the mucus out it just drains me physically. I've felt a ton better for a couple of days so I told Tim we should do this local 5K this morning. It was nice to be outside in the fresh air. So I'm sitting in the back of the crowd just chugging along at my easy pace. Baby wasn't cooperating initially, just decided to position itself really low in the pelvis and it was very uncomfortable. After about 1/2 mile, the baby moved position and my pelvis didn't feel like it was about to rip in half, so that made the rest of the run mostly comfortable. I actually came across right at a 10 min/mile; I was very surprised at that. It felt like I was doing about 12 or 13/mile.

Post run, things are a little tight and tender for the first few steps, but overall it feels good. I started wearing this belly band thing I found at Motherhood. I wish I would have know or found this thing during the first two pregnancies. It's made a world of difference with the running. It keeps they belly from bouncing too much and gives the back some extra support....it has even helped with the incontinence issue I was having previously from running.

So 22 weeks in and everything is going well. Aside from one irregular urine screen which led to an early and extra glucose test, things are going well. I'm over the hump and we're going to be so busy now that Tim is "in race season" that the last 18 weeks should fly by.

19 February 2011

Dinner Conversations

I realize the last two post are about conversations, but geez, out of the mouth of babes I suppose. Usually our dinner conversations, when we all eat together, consist of "how was your day", "what did you talk about at school", "you need to sit down while you eat", "don't poke your brother with your fork", "if you're playing that means you're done"....those sorts of things.

And the responses that follow are very simple "good, busy", "friends, the letter 'R'", "I am sitting", "he poked me first" or "I'm done".

Truth be told, and I'm embarrassed to admit this, especially knowing how I was raised where family dinners were so important and regular...but we hardly ever have family dinners. One of us is either working, the other is making dinner on the fly, we're not even home, or if we are the kids are eating while we are cleaning up or working. We are victims to our own busy schedules. It's something that needs to change I know, but it just hasn't yet. No excuses.

Well tonight, Brayden was asking his usual "more please". The kid can honestly eat more than I do in a day. As I tell him to finish what's on his plate first, he starts crying because he dropped part of his dinner on the floor and the dog (Bowden) ate it. "Bowden, you give that back to me now."

Brayden, he can't give it back. He ate it.
"Mommy, he can give it back, he doesn't have a belly to put it in."
Well, where does food go then when he eats it?
"He pees it out"
So where does food go when you eat it?
"To my belly, then I pee."
So Bowden doesn't have a belly?
"No, no belly."

I never knew...mouth to pee with one bite. If only. Maybe we should be having more family dinners to discuss such things in more detail.

13 February 2011

Morning conversations

Well we're a week into this flu at our house, so Ryan and Tim have both had it and are recovering now and yesterday marked Day 1 for Brayden. Luckily we got him to the doctor in time to get some Tamiflu. I've been unusually tired lately so I was hoping that the boys would sleep late since they are both still not feeling well.

I was wrong. At 6:45, they come marching into our room wanting orange juice and to crawl in bed. Ryan cozied up next to Tim, Brayden laid next to me and they both acted as if they would fall back asleep. After what I wished was more than 60 seconds the conversation began at a barely audible volume....a very soft whisper then slowly turning into a shouting match. That's very typical for our house unfortunately. The loudest is the best, or so they think.

Ryan: hey brayden, are you sick now too?
Brayden: Yeah, daddy took me to the doctor and I got medicine....Ryan is those spaceships on your pjs?
Ryan: Yeah, spaceships that glow. I hope you don't get sick like me...that was yucky sick.
Brayden: Yucky sick! Ewww, but I got medicine
Ryan: Well I took medicine and it made me more sick.
Brayden: More Sick? Ryyyaaannn. OH No. I don't want more sick.
Brayden: UH OH, I don't like that.
Mommy: Boys, let's keep it quiet please. We don't need to yell.
Ryan and Brayden (in unison): OK, mommy, we'll try
Ryan: Brayden we have to be quiet so we can sleep
Brayden: No, it's wake up time it's not sleep time....SEE I SHOW You the SUN.

At that point it was a lost cause, just get up...go down stairs and make pancakes. It was wake up time for goodness sake.

06 February 2011

Motivated to Ride

Well, truth is that I've never gotten back to my "normal" exercise routine since the IM and through the first 1/2 of this pregnancy, but you know what the motivation is now to get out of this house and head to the gym for a 2hr spin class....

A germ infested house. Ryan and Brayden have been little snot factories for about 2 weeks now, and it's come to a head with ryan this morning. His fever is 101, tummy hurting, eyes red and watery, red ears, shaking from lack of food because he's not hungry and feeling cold. Yup, I've done the mommy job all morning and before I get another cough or sneeze in the face, I need to get out of here for some "normal" sweaty, musty air at the gym. I suppose the increased surface area of my thighs should also be motivation but whatever.

At the same time, I'm watching Brayden wipe yellowish snot across his face and I'm listening to Tim constantly suck snot back into his body. My super vitamins are only super to an extent. I need a germinator in here. I need to bleach every surface of this house and send them all away for a week.

Errggg, I feel bad for my boys but good grief if I get sick I'm going to loose my mind. I'm already dealing with a nose that is forever stuffy and a scratchy throat. Time to spin this mess out of my body.

31 January 2011

And the results are in...

Well, I have to admit that this pregnancy has had we worried from day 1. It was hard to tell in the first 2 months what was going on. The fatigue, the nausea...both "normal" but worse than the previous 2 pregnancies. Then came abdominal cramping and bleeding...nothing that I experienced with Ryan or Brayden. So I was freaked out, called the nurse crying because I thought I was having a miscarriage.

I started having a lot of issues with my blood sugar being low, being extremely dizzy and just feeling weak. I contributed most of this to getting pregnant so soon after IM but I just didn't know. The ultrasound at 9 weeks was "normal" and the heart beat was strong (135 or so). But again, that worried me because everybody says 140 and up is normal and both boys were high (Ryan high 160s and Brayden right at 160).

I started feeling "normal" or actually more like I had with the first two pregnancies around 12-13 weeks..right on schedule right? But then I felt the baby move for the first time around 14 weeks. It's funny how much sooner you feel it after the first pregnancy because you know what it is. Ryan I didn't feel until about 18 wks, Brayden around 15-16 weeks and now this one even sooner. Although I told the dr. it was probably just gas...I didn't want her thinking I was crazy.

With both boys, once I felt them move the first time, it was nonstop until they were born. There was never any doubt they were there or any need for that "kick count" tracking in the third trimester. They were there and they let me know all day...kidneys, stomach, ribs, spleen, bladder, heck sometimes it even felt like they were kicking my throat. But this time...not so much. I feel movement maybe once a day or every other day...it's unsettling almost.

I was so worried last week when we went to the 18 wk ultrasound. But again, all baby's measurements, baby's weight and heart rate (137) and uterus measurement were still "normal". There is just no explanation other than this one is just not a mover I suppose. One explanation they gave for the lack of movement was how low the baby is in the uterus. There's plenty of room in there as my uterus is up to my belly button already, but baby is staying nice and cozy with back firmly planted on my pelvic floor, below my pelvic bone.

For the first time in 3 pregnancies they did however come back with an abnormal urine test last week, which could explain a few things. And they are having me take the glucose test at 20 weeks and 26 weeks this time instead of just the 26 week test. The only explanation I was given was since diabetes was in my family, they should screen earlier...but they didn't do that the first two pregnancies and this is the same practice I've been to all three times. So is there reason for stress or worry, I don't think so...things are just different this time. Not harder or bad, just different.

Tim and I opted out of finding out the sex this time. We probably did it backwards from most, finding out the first two then not this time...but we just wanted to be surprised this time. It's definitely the last time we do this...so why not? Does all of this mean I think it's a girl. I don't know. Sometimes I think "most definitely", then other days I drift back to the idea that is probably just a laid back little boy...after all I have two already...so odds would probably say boy.

The only thing I am sure of is that they say baby is healthy right now, and that's all that matters.

16 January 2011

2 days and couting

I'm so excited! Wednesday morning at 8:25 am, I will be boarding a plan to California to visit my sister. Her and her husband have lived near San Fransisco since my senior year of college, so we don't get to see each other much; I think it's worked out to about once/year. So it was actually a great treat when they got to come watch me at the IM in Maryland and now I'm getting to see her so soon again afterward.

Being the insightful person that she is, when she found out I was pregnant again, she almost immediately said "you're gonna need time away to chill out...why don't we get together for a long weekend." Cool. Well the plans to meet somewhere neutral didn't really pan out, but then she told me that some friends of hers would let us use their place in Sonoma.

I'm flying out Wednesday morning and staying until Sunday. The thing I love about spending time with my sister is uneventful it is, not in a bad way. It's just that there is no pressure to go sight see or do things, just sit around, talk and relax. We'll probably go out a few times but mostly just hanging out and sleeping a lot. To top it all off, her husband will not be there. He has his own "boys weekend" that he is going to participate in. Not that I mind him being around, but it will just be great girl time. Hmm, that sounds odd considering my sister and I aren't really girly girls, but female time is always needed and appreciated. I'm out numbered right now, way too much testosterone in the house.

I've already got some mommy guilt about leaving Tim with the boys because I know it will impact his training a little and I know it's going to be a lot of work for him. But there's a larger part of me that realizes that I need this break right now. I'm so stressed out and tired and it's affecting my attitude. So 5 days away is probably beneficial for everyone right now. Truth be told, it would probably be a good idea for us to plan another trip away around May before the baby gets here....just a sneaking suspicion that one last break is warranted before another big change, to collect thoughts and gather patience.

I've already gotten comments from co-workers though "what a waste, you're going to Sonoma and can't event drink..I should go for you." Uh, no you shouldn't and bite your tongue people! I'm sure there is plenty else to do for people that choose not to partake in a "tour of wine country". For now, I'm excited for 60 degree weather and sunshine, sleeping as long as I want, no cleaning, no cooking, no responsibility, and no work. Ahhh....2 more days to go.

04 January 2011

Just feeling normal and then maybe not so much. (Pregnancy related issues this post)

I can't say that any of my first trimesters have been bad, because truth be told they have all been pretty mild compared to most women I talk to. But I can definitely say that this time has been the worst of the three. Tons of things contributed to that I suppose, being sick with a virus, IM recovery, 2 little ones already running around, 2 dogs, a full time job, a full time husband and other various part-time activities. I definitely had the worst nausea and fatigue and then just random "icky" feeling this time.

It started around week 6 and I thought it was done around week 9, but now that I'm at 15+ weeks, I can tell it lasted longer. It was only really last week that I felt good enough to do more than 2 days of exercise. I actually worked out 5 days last week, 1 of which was the Resolution run 5K. It's amazing how much better I feel just having been able to get some physical exercise in. Really, it's amazing how much more normal I feel. I mean the highlight of my week this week was being able to say, "I'm going to track practice tonight." Knowing full well that I wasn't going to do the workout, but I was going and was just going to run around that track with everybody else there. That's enough for me for now.

But during lap 2 of my run I had to stop to use the bathroom, which reminded me of the 5K this past Saturday morning, which reminded me why I eventually had to stop running in the second pregnancy with Brayden...the bladder doesn't quite have the same control as it normally does. I peed myself during the race pretty bad, and really without a huge urge to go. I mean really I had just gone 2 minutes before the start and I peed myself at mile 2.25 or something like that...like a good 10-12 oz...seriously???? Come on! Seriously?!?

Like I said, I had to stop running with Brayden because I had to wear pads to run due to the bladder control issue. It got to where that didn't help, so I just stopped. Although I shouldn't be surprised. It was an issue during the first pregnancy as well. I'm about to share a very embarrassing story about pregnancy with Ryan.

I was about 36 weeks pregnant and Tim and I took a trip to Home Depot for some random things. I went to the bathroom before walking out the door. We drove 10 minutes up the road and were walking around the store. Tim needed to go in one direction and I in another. So we split up. A few minutes later, Ryan kicks...really hard. I'm not talking a normal "oh, baby's got a strong kick", I'm talking break a rib kick. Fortunately, it was not my ribs he kicked. Unfortunately, it was my bladder. And at that moment I lost literally about a liter or more of urine on the floor of home depot.

As if this weren't enough, right at that exact moment, a very young (20 at the most, probably 18 or 19 yr old) man who worked there came around the corner and yelled out. "Oh ma'am...Oh are you ok. Did your water brake? Oh crap, don't move, don't move....I'll get help. Oh man." At that point other shoppers came flocking to see what was going on. Two older ladies came up to me and told me to sit down, that my water broke. I told one of them "I don't think it's my water, I think it's urine" to which she replied "honey, it's okay. You don't need to be scared, we'll get you to the hospital. It's not urine. You just need to accept that you're about to have a baby."

Well I started thinking: 1. I had just gone to the bathroom at home, no way I had that much urine in my bladder, 2. It was clear, not any tint to it at all and 3. There was no smell to it. Hmmm, maybe it was my water. The worker returned with paper towels and a wheel chair as a voice over the intercom said "Will customer Tim who's wife is pregnant please come to Isle 6 immediately". This caused yet another flood of customers. Then they put me in the wheel chair while the worker proceeded to clean up the mess with no gloves on. All the while I'm whispering to Tim that I think it's just pee. Everyone is telling Tim to hurry and get me to the hospital, and he says "I will right after I pay for this stuff." Crap, we're there, might as well get it, right? Idunno.

To the hospital we go. Monitors, internals and little paper tests....all say "it was just pee". But I did have Ryan a week later. For what it's worth, I did not step foot in that Home Depot for a good 8-10 months. Just couldn't do it.

Now, how does one work around a weak bladder during pregnancy in order to keep up running. I don't want to have to give it up again. Previously I just kept up with biking, the elliptical and some swimming, but I would love to keep running if I can.